it's a start

Art journaling. A few months ago I bought the book Journal Spilling and have been looking through it since. I tried to convince myself I didn't need another journal to start this. I tried using some I had already started. But as I mentioned in an early entry I love starting journals. Something about all the new pages. New possibilities. So in honor of the end of the academic year and a lighter work week during the summer, I picked up a few things at Blick yesterday. Mainly I went in for these...

I had a 30% off coupon and so I splurged on the set of 30. I LOVE them! I love trying new materials. My first art love was charcoal. Black and white landscapes. I did those in college and still enjoy them. But it has been awhile since I have done a lot of drawing from life - or realistic. Later in grad school I loved NuPastels. I still enjoy those...along with my Prismacolor pencils. But only when I'm journaling or doing abstract stuff. Recently I have been enjoying watercolor pencils, my little set of travel watercolors and my waterbrush. If you have never tried a waterbrush I highly recommend the Yasutomo brand. I started with the medium brush. They work great for doing art while traveling.They are easy to bring to work with me and in between group sessions I can do a little thinking and painting. But they are so neat. I'm a perfectionist. But I have always wanted to have a big, overgrown, messy journal. I am not sure I can do it but I will try. It is a goal in life too. To let myself just try things and not worry about how it will look, etc. I am always hesitant about making "mistakes", getting messy, looking stupid, etc. All those insecurities. And being that I'm an art therapist...I want a dose of my own medicine. So I'm going to try it. Here's what I worked on today...

Started with a page of journaling about all the things on my mind. Then I let myself play around with gesso over my words and then my new Neocolors. Still a little neat for what I am trying to do. But it's a start.

Note: after writing this entry I noticed that Donna Downey's blog for her Inspiration Wednesday this week shows how she uses these watercolor crayons and her waterbrush in her art journal.

Happy Saturday!

my name is emily and i am a journal starter

I am a journal starter. I am good at getting a nice, clean new journal full of blank pages. I am good at using the first pages. But then I quit. When my Virgo, perfectionist self takes over. When the pages get messy. Or when my handwriting gets messy. I quit. And then I start a new journal.

That is my pattern. I run a therapeutic journaling group and have for six years. I don't take my own advice and just put stuff out there and not worry about the end result. I hesitate and am afraid to have it not be pretty. I have always wanted to create some art and journaling that is just messy. I have gotten better and have let myself just play more than I used to. But still have struggled with doing this in journals. I must have so many of them in my box of high school and college memorabilia in my parent's shed. None are finished!

For the past few years I have carried around an inspiration book/journal with me. I get these 5x7 wire bound sketchbooks and fill them with magazine cutouts, card sketches, journaling, thoughts, gripes, etc. I don't let myself cut out pages if I don't like them. I have several volumes I have filled. This has been great. I use them when I sit down to scrap, knit, paint or make cards. But I really want to do an Art Journal. A place to just experiment, put down my thoughts. I want the pages to be heavier so they can handle layers of paint and stuff. I just bought the book Journal Spilling at my LSS Friday. I love it! So many awesome ideas I can use in my Art Therapy groups and for my own Art Therapy. I hope this marks the end of my journal starting addiction?

a day for just me

Fisherman at the Wheel - Gloucester, MA

Before I share about my day I have to share something pretty cool. My hometown...or I should say a landmark in my hometown... will be featured on the Massachusetts version of the Quarter to be released later this year.

As for the rest of my day...

Today was for me. I took my time. Went where I wanted - when I wanted. Selfish I know. But so worth it.

I slept in. 9:00am. That's late for me! Took my tme getting ready and headed out. I frequent a coffee shop in my hometown and they have a "frequent shopper" card. After 10 coffees you get one free. Today was my free day. I splurged....with the beautiful 60' day I had my 1st official iced drink since last summer. A large Iced Mocha Latte...worth the 8000 calories that were probably in it.

Then I went to the mall...the "grown-up" mall... as my dad calls it. We have 2 malls in our area. One is the "kiddie mall" my dad says. That one has the cheaper stores, teens hanging out, not as nice all around. The "grown-up" mall on the other hand is luxury! I browsed around Sephora, H&M, Macy's, took in the wonderful scents coming out of Williams & Sonoma....

I enjoyed myself.

I used up a small giftcard my work gave me on some new, cute PJ's. I also got a basic white Spring jacket. I also got these spring-like tanks at the Gap to wear under some sweaters I have....



and these cute bracelets from Macy's. I loved the ribbon "packaging."




I browsed around C.O. Bigelow and ended up with Bigelow Mentha Lip Tint - Pink.

Lastly, I stopped at Michael's to use my 40% off coupon on some cake watercolors. I got a small Moleskin watercolor book yesterday and really want to use it for a journal. But I want some portable watercolors to bring with me to work and wherever. I have some watercolors in tubes packed up in my stuff but they are not accessible right now and in general aren't as portable. I love this little set...

After all this I went to my parent's for a visit. Had some pizza with them and a cake my mom baked. Mmmm. I love visiting them. Made plans for later this week with my sister and headed home. A nice day to escape from my mess of an apartment, get out in the beautiful weather and just relax.

Tomorrow I'll share my second pair of fingerless Fetching gloves. Messed up a little with my pattern but my changes make them still work. I have one glove done...one to go. When I finish this pair I'll make a second pair with this yarn that will actually be the length I had intended...I'll explain tomorrow ;)

Happy Saturday!

an idea

Just wanted to quickly share something before I go to class (2 more weeks - Yeah!). Reading Ali's blog today I was inspired by a woman's blog she linked - Erin Zamrzla. Using recycled paper, she makes little books and things. I decided that this was something I wanted to try with my Art Therapy group tomorrow at work. I've been struggling with new topics and ideas that will help them focus on thier goals and issues in a new and interesting way. So I did a sample today so they could get the idea and gathered up some index cards, envelopes, cardboard, manila file folders, string, hole punches,..you get the idea. I hope that in the coming weeks the group can work on some art therapy group topics in their little books...(i.e. we've focused on coping skills, goals, successes, stressors, etc.). Usually we just work on these topics in drawings or collages but this way they'll have a place to "hold" all of these group experiences. We'll see how it goes....it's pretty plain right now but maybe I'll show mine when things get added to it.

art, life, growth, uncertainty

I started a new Art Journal this weekend. All I have done is the cover. I have been making these collages in the outline of a Mandala (a circle) during one of the art therapy groups I run. Mandalas are used in art therapy frequently and there are many theories and an assessment developed using this form. But just as far as a process they are so relaxing and a form of meditation. They are found in all cultures and I use them a lot in my work and in my own art. No rules other than start with the circle form and go from there. I've been doing a series lately with small squares of magazine collage in colors, patterns and textures that appeal to me. I decided to use it for the cover of my journal....now....where to begin inside...

I want to not think it out too much

Be more spontaneous and free with what I put down

Not worry about my art being pretty

Experiment with techniques, combinations, ideas

Get out my feelings

That's what I hope this journal will be. I tried another in the winter but it really became a different sort of journal. Not the type where I let myself get messy and not worry. I need this badly in my life right now. I'm worrying and feeling negative and it's affecting me and in particular my relationship with Cary. I need to lighten up and I plan to use this journal to help with this.

Today I also took a few minutes out of the day at work to do my own art therapy. Trying to figure out my feelings about clients, work and myself. I found a magazine image I had saved from a Martha Stewart magazine. It was of an acorn that had started to sprout into an oak tree. I loved it. Growth. That's what came to mind when I saw it. How do you grow? What nurtures you? What hinders your growth? How do you get "unstuck"? All of these questions float in my mind and there is something in this picture that fits it all for me. I decided to take my charcoal's and paper to work today so I could focus on it for 10 minutes. Here's what I started...

I was thinking about drawing last night. I used to draw realistic charcoal and pencil drawings all the time. Still lifes, landscapes. I have a huge on one my wall that I see daily that was part of my senior thesis in college. I loved drawing. The challenge of making something look real. It is the perfectionist in me and represents the opposite sort of art I want to do in my Art Journal. I think I need a little of both. Art I can control more and art that is loose. I am feeling out of control with certain elements of my life right now and I hate it. Uncertainty. I need to find a sense of order somewhere and my drawing can do that. I can use my Art Journal for lightening up!

Thanks for listening to me go on and on!